Tuesday, February 16, 2021

Under The Sunset Series: Magnolia

Painting by Lindsay Adams

*Disclaimer Adult Content*

Magnolia honey, the Cazlears will be here momentarily. Please brush your hair.


Magnolia stared out the window wishing the sun could freeze time. Momma had arranged a meeting with the Cazlears, one of the richest families in New Orleans Parish, because their son had taken a liking to Magnolia.


Where you say he see’nt me ‘gain Momma?


Practice your manners and speak like you’ve had proper schooling. Mrs. Cazlear said he saw you at Armstrong Park in the rose garden. 


What's his name 'gain Momma?


Jean Pierre. Her mother sighed.


Magnolia began brushing her hair. She blamed herself and her love of flower gazing around the city for this strange stalker meet up. It was hot in Louisiana and all her friends were meeting up later at Lake Pontchartrain for a night swim. 


Mama, Imma miss the night swim. Jackie and Fabi were to come by and get me.


I doubt dinner will be done before dark darling. You’ll be able to join Jacqueline and Fabienne next Friday.


Magnolia hated when Momma put on heirs. She was always pretending to be someone she was not. Like she had more than what she had. Why, even the thought of the Leveaus entertaining the Cazlears? I bet you it was Momma’s idea, she thought. Least I could’ve spent Friday night in a mansion in Fontainebleau. 


Her mother had been slaving all day in preparation. Ironing linens. Cleaning. Cooking. She even got Mrs. Toussaint to agree to serve the meal so it appeared that they had hired help. Magnolia was looking forward to her Momma’s Crawfish Ètouffée though. She could smell the aroma seeping upstairs from the kitchen.


When you are done Magnolia go sit with your father in the parlor so you are ready to receive our guests. 


The parlor, really Momma?


Be there in 5 minutes girl. You don’t want this problem. 


Momma closed the door. 


Magnolia thought of climbing out her bedroom window and making a run for it but she didn’t want to embarrass her family. Momma had been working so hard. She hated her conscience for always interrupting her plans.


She sprayed some parfum on her neck and wrists and walked downstairs to sit with Daddy.


When her father saw her he smiled. 


You know why I named you Magnolia? 


Why Daddy? 


Magnolia had heard this story so many times before but loved the way her Daddy told it. She went and sat on the arm of his chair.


Well, you were born prematurely. Tiny little thing. He laughed. Magnolia loved his high pitch laugh followed by a knee slap and smoker's cough.


The doctors at Ochsner were good people. They watched over you but it was taking too long for my liking. See, you were unresponsive to touch and never opened your eyes. You were breathing and all but you weren’t living. I was your Daddy and I felt a responsibility to try and do something. Help out the medics, you know? Cause even though they got the education, I got the wisdom. 'Sides they hovered over you too much and everybody knows a watched pot never boils. I went home and got my record player and my records and set up shop right next to you. Day 6, I’ll never forget, I was holding you and went and sat by the window so you could get some sunlight. You had them crusties 'round your eyes and I was wiping your face down with a damp cloth. Had Ellis Marsalis playing Magnolia Triangle on the record, and hot dog! Don’t you know you opened those big brown eyes of yours? He laughed. 


And you had a nerve to be smiling!  You see, in order for a Magnolia to grow it needs sunlight, dampness, and jazz music! Look at you now in full bloom. 


Magnolia smiled.


I know you don’t want to but oblige your mother this evening. You know how she is. After dinner I’ll drive you to meet up with your friends.


Magnolia hugged her Daddy tight. She lingered a bit because her Daddy was her favorite scent. He smelled of bergamot, vanilla and geranium. 


Magnolia went and sat in the bay window of what Mama called the parlor room. It was the perfect spot because it faced the street and she'd be able to see the Cazlears arrive. She wanted to get a good look at Jean Pierre before he walked into the house. She wondered if he was kind or one of those snobby rich boys? A few minutes later a car pulls up out front. 


This must be them Daddy, Magnolia said.


He put on his glasses and gets up to take a peek 


Thats a Mercedes-Benz 220 S Cabriolet, he gawked.


Stone grey with chrome trimming! Magnolia replied.


They high fived each other. Magnolia’s favorite pastime other than flower gazing around the city was car guessing with Daddy.


Let me go get your mother.  


Only two people were in the car. In the passenger's seat a petite woman in a Tiffany blue sundress and in the driver's seat a young man of average height in a 3 piece beige linen suit. He got out of the car walked around the front and opened up the passenger's side door letting the woman out. The woman fondled over the young man as if he was her own personal doll. She even used her handkerchief and wiped around his face with it. Magnolia wished she could hear what they were saying. From the body language the young man seemed annoyed. He reached in the back seat of the car grabbed a bouquet of white lilacs. Magnolia was impressed. Lilacs happened to be one of her favorite flowers.


They walked up the stairs, onto the porch and knocked on the door.


Magnolia come. Her mother called. 


Her Daddy opened the door and her Mother went into full performance mode.


Mrs. Cazlear welcome to the Leveau family home. Please come right this way to the parlor. 


Magnolia rolled her eyes. When she looked up Jean Pierre her was looking at her. He smiled and handed her the bouquet. Magnolia took the flowers and quickly turned her head and followed Momma into the parlor.


Please make yourselves at home. It’s so hot outside. Can I offer you something to drink? A mint julep perhaps, Mrs. Cazlear? 


Momma heard that Mrs. Cazlear frequented the St. Charles and the mint julep was her drink of choice.


Oh please, call me Adelaide, Mrs. Cazlear said. The less formal the better. This is my son Jean Pierre IV. Thank you for having us, your home is beautiful!


Mrs. Cazlear was so nice to be so rich, Magnolia thought. 


She apologized for her husband’s absence. He was, "away on business."


At dinner, Mrs. Cazlear raved about how good the food was. How great the service was. How hospitable Momma had been. How debonair Daddy was and how beautiful and well mannered Magnolia was.


Momma was beside herself blushing at every compliment thrown her way.


Jean Pierre didn’t say anything the entire dinner. He did have 6 servings of Étouffée which agitated Magnolia. She had already made plans to pack some for lunch in the park tomorrow. He's a rich greedy mute, she thought.


After dinner, Momma ushered everyone back into the parlor for after dinner cocktails. Daddy offered to roll Mrs. Cazlear a cigarillo. 


Magnolia, why don’t you and Jean Pierre have dessert on the porch? Momma suggested.


Magnolia rolled her eyes. Can the man even talk? She thought.


Magnolia got up and walked outside onto the porch. Jean Pierre followed. She slipped off her shoes and sat on the porch swing with her legs criss crossed. Jean Pierre stood looking down at her.


They both sat in silence for a moment. Both waiting for the other to speak. 


You look beautiful tonight. Jean Pierre said.


Wow! He speaks! Magnolia sarcastically proded.


Yes I do. I'm sorry I clam up around people I don't know. So, I generally let mother do all the talking at social gatherings.


Ah, I see. I was beginning to think you a mute or something. 


He smiles and shakes his head. 


No, I’m not a mute. Sometimes you have to just listen and take it all in. You know?


Magnolia looks off and starts biting her nails. 


Dinner was nice, Jean Pierre adds.


Magnolia wanted to say, yea you sure did eat up everything! But she censored herself. 


Wanna sit down? She replied


Sure.


Jean Pierre sat.


I like this, he said, referencing the porch swing.


He moved back and forth. I could definitely use one of these. 


I missed the sunset. Wish we could’ve have had dinner out on the deck and I would've caught it. Magnolia says sulkingly.


Have you ever seen the sunset at Lake Pontchartrain? Over the water? It’s beautiful. Not as beautiful as you but a close 2nd, said Jean Pierre.


I have. It’s one of my favorite places in New Orleans. I was supposed to go today with my friends but you called so...couldn’t. 


I’m sorry about that. 


No worries. You had no way of knowing. I’m just glad I didn’t cancel my plans to have dinner with a mute.


They both laughed.


A slight breeze scurried by tickling the wind chimes. 


They sat in silence.


Magnolia looked at Jean Pierre who was looking up at the sky. 


Taking it all in huh? She says.


Always.


The heat of the summer evening seemed to be losing its momentum to the breeze.


I have to ask, why me? Why’d you need to meet me? We had dinner, now what?


Well I-I... he cleared his throat.


I saw you in Armstrong Park staring at the roses. So intently like. Like they were talking to you or you to them with your eyes, you know? And your eyes were just...soul soothers. I wanted to know more about the flower girl with the big brown eyes. I hope that doesn't come off too weird?


Magnolia repositioned herself on the swing.


I saw you speaking to Mr. Baptiste while you were there. After you left I asked him about you. He told me you were a Leveau and your family was good people. I had my mother call to set up a meeting. I’m open to what’s next but I’m hoping I can see you again? Maybe hang out without our folks next time? 


That’s cool. Magnolia said hesitantly.


They hear jazz playing and laughing coming from inside the house.


Uh oh. My Daddy, pulled out his records. I’m definitely not going to make it to the lake tonight. 


I could drive you. 


Really?


Yea sure. It’s the least I can do for interrupting your plans. Mother is on her 10th mint julep by now so, she won’t miss me.


Ok. Let me check in with my Momma.


Magnolia goes back inside and sees Momma clearing the table. 


Momma, Jean Pierre wants to drive to the lake, can I go?


You guys haven't had your beignets yet.


Momma looks at Magnolia who is rolling her eyes.


You gonna get enough of rolling them eyes, girl. 


Momma hesitantly agrees.


Ok. You can go. But be back at a decent hour.


Thank you Momma! Magnolia turns quickly.


Magnolia!


Ma'am?


Remember who you are. 


Yes Ma’am. 


When she passed the parlor room she saw Mrs. Cazlear with her shoes off dancing around Daddy's chair, mint julep in one hand and the cigarillo in the other. 


She locked eyes with Daddy who had the SOS look on his face. She thought about saving him but Momma could handle it. 


Magnolia went back outside and walked to the car. Jean Pierre opened the passenger's side door and let her in. 


You like the top down or up? He asked.


Down. Magnolia was excited to ride in a luxury car.


Jean Pierre took off. Magnolia loved the ride. She leaned her head back, closed her eyes, and let her hair collapse in the wind. Occasionally, Jean Pierre would glance over at her and smile. He was captivated by her carefreeness.


They pulled up to the lake. Jean Pierre opened the door for Magnolia. 


My friends are chill and easy to talk to. Magnolia grabs his hand and pulls him along. 


Magnolia introduced Jean Pierre to her friends.


How you goin' swim in that suit? Jackie teased.


Yeah man, take off that dressy suit! Fabi echoed.


Magnolia took off her dress and under it had on a floral bra and panty set. Jean Pierre watched her. She ran into the lake immersing herself fully under water. When she came back up her eyes were closed, head tilted back and she was smiling. She opened her eyes and looked across the lake at Jean Pierre. He stared at her.


You getting in or what rich boy? Fabi teased.


Jean Pierre took off his 3 piece linen suit. Magnolia swims over to a large rock and leans up against it. Jean Pierre gets into the lake and swims over to her. 


Water alright for you? She asks.


Yes.


She looks up at the sky.


I probably should head back home in a few. Momma told me to be back at a sensible hour.


Alright. 


They both let silence linger.


Can I kiss you Magnolia?


Magnolia looks at him and nods her head, yes.


He leans in and kisses her. Technically this was her first kiss. She didn’t count Charles in the 6th grade whose mouth tasted like Cheerios and piss. She liked it. A lot. Jean Pierre began kissing her eyelids, her earlobes and her neck. He pressed his weight against her body wedging her body between his and the rock. He reached down underneath the water and started to caress her breast. 


She closed her eyes and leaned her head back. 


She heard a voice whisper, remember who you are.


Stop. she whispered. 


It’s ok. I got you. He takes his hand and moves her underwear to the side. He slides his fingers across her clitoris.


She opened her eyes. 


In the distance she sees the silhouette of a woman holding candles ascending from the water. 


Remember who you are. The voice grew stronger. 


Stop it please Jean Pierre! She begged.


Relax, its ok. He says.


He slides his fingers into her her vaginal opening.


The silhouette of the women comes closer. Magnolia grabs Jean Pierre's neck and squeezes. The closer the silhouette got the tighter she squeezed. Jean Pierre began struggling to breathe.


Who are you? The silhouette of the woman spoke to her.


I am a defendant of Marie Cathrine Leveau!


Magnolia screams. Still squeezing.


I am a descendant of Marie Catherine Leveau!


Jean Pierre's body collapses into the water.


The silhouette of the woman blows out the candles.


Water still.


Silent breeze.










Thursday, February 4, 2021

Under The Sunset Series: Ravi

*Disclaimer Adult Content*

Self-Care Sundays was Ravi’s ritual. This Sunday was special because it fell on the eve of her 30th birthday. She wanted to pray and reflect and thank the gods for bringing her through to see a new year around the sun.


She woke up early, placed some eucalyptus, honey, and other offerings on her deity. She lit the agarbatti and rang a bell to awaken Surya. She sprinkled a drop of Ganja jal on her head and began her puja. She thanked Surya, the god of the sun, for the warm covering over her life, clarity in mind, and peace. 


The night before, she spent the evening detangling her hair. That in itself was always a feat. Her grandmother blamed her Kenyan father for the thickness of hair and the darkness of her skin. Her Mom’s family is from Hiware Bazar, India. Colorism and classism  infiltrated her affluent family. So when her Mom got pregnant by a Kenyan photographer, her family forbade their union. Ravi's Mom chose her family over love. This left young Ravi having to split her time between two countries. India and Kenya. Two differing societies, two differing religious practices, two differing ways of life. She spent most of her life confused. One thing that made sense however, was the way her Mom and Dad looked at each other when they met up to pass her off throughout the years. They loved each other still. You could tell. Ravi decided at a very young age that love had to be the way her Mom and Dad looked at each other. 

 

She finished her puja and went into her bathroom which was her personal deity. The place she loved most in her home. She lit her Nag Champa candles and ran her bath water.


When Ravi was 17 her Dad got married and moved to the states. This excited her. Not that he married someone other than her Mom but now she'd be able to split her time between India and California. Her favorite American TV show was Girlfriends. She dreamed of moving to California and getting a fancy job with a big desk like Joan had in Girlfriends. She left India at 18 after receiving a full scholarship to Pepperdine University. She always believed the gods answered her prayers of living her life out in Cali. The gods surely would stick with her and see her through. 


Freshman year she made lots of friends. Hung out with the rich white kids who loved to teach immigrants how to navigate the mean streets of Malibu. She met Jenna 2nd semester of Freshman year when she decided to live on campus, and not at her Dad's, to get the full collegiate experience. When she walked into her new dorm room, Jenna looked her up and down, “you’re beautiful” she said with a sense of relief. Jenna ran over and gave Ravi hug. 


"How do you say your name?"


“Ravi...” 


“I’m gonna call you Ra-Ra for short. My Ra-Ra."


Ravi felt herself shrinking allowing Jenna’s personality to shine. Jenna inserted herself in Ravi’s life instantly. Physically and mentally. 


“I got some coke!” Jenna proclaimed running through the door one night. "This should help me study. Try it with me!" 


“No. I’m not doing drugs! Are you kidding Jenna?” 


“Fine. I want to try it. At least you’ll be here if something goes down.” 


Ravi watched Jenna sniff her first line on the dorm room floor. Jenna laid back, stared at the ceiling and coasted. She talked about how beautiful Ravi’s hair and skin was until she fell asleep. Ravi watched Jenna all night praying she’d wake up. The last thing she needed was to have an overdosed roommate on her conscience. 


The next morning Jenna popped up like nothing happened. 


“Want to go to the cafe?”


“Are you ok?” 


“I’m fine. Let’s not make this a thing ok? Don’t overthink it.”


But it was a thing. Jenna began doing coke almost every night to "study." Every night she’d talk to Ravi about Ravi. 


“I wish you knew how gorgeous you are my Ra Ra. You can have any guy you want.” 


Jenna stared at Ravi intently. This reminded Ravi of how her Dad would stare at her Mom. Truth is, Ravi liked the attention she got from coked up Jenna. 


How Jenna would look at her. 

Talk about her. 

Run her fingers in circles around the small of her back.

Played with her hair. 


Jenna began sniffing lines off parts of Ravi’s body for fun. It started with her hand. Every night she'd explore a different part of Ravi's temple. 


Back.

Neck.

Butt.

Stomach.

Breasts. 

Thighs. 




“You sure you want to do this? Ravi asked. 


“Since the moment I saw you. I want all of you. Let me in Ra-Ra.” 


Ravi spread her legs revealing her lotus flower. Jenna sprinkled it with coke and sniffed. Then she started licking it continuously. Sucking vigorously. Swallowing the nectar of her soul. Taking Ravi to a place she’d never been before. She had never surrendered herself to anyone in this way. Jenna was the first. This wasn't a deflowering like her grandma used to warn her about. She felt more in bloom than ever before.


This happened a lot over the next 2 years. They spent summers together at Jenna’s Mom's beach house and continued to room together during the school year. Ravi knew her family wouldn’t approve. So she went silent on them. She stopped praying and the gods went silent on her. She didn’t want to  make the same mistake her Mom made. She chose love over family. She chose love over Hinduism.


Junior year she kissed Jenna goodbye as they went off to class. They were planning to take a drive along the coast to watch the sunset later. That afternoon Ravi went back to their apartment, showered, picked out a dress she knew Jenna would love and waited for her. 


5:29 PM still no Jenna. 


The sun was starting its descend.  


Ravi began worrying. She called Jenna's phone and it went straight to voicemail. She called her Mom and she hadn’t seen her. She went to the parking lot and her car was still there. She called mutual friends, no luck. Ravi walked around campus all night looking for her. She was nowhere to be found. Weeks had gone by and no one had heard from her or seen her. After 2 months, Jenna’s Mom sent movers to come gather her things out of the apartment. 


“You can have her car. I know she’d want you to have it,” her Mom told her on the phone.


Ravi sunk into depression. She moved back home with her Dad and Stepmom. She started a Facebook account to see if she could find Jenna. She scoured through thousands of profiles of women named Jenna with no success. Ravi began cutting herself on her thigh, hoping to ease the immeasurable pain and loss she felt. Her last year at Pepperdine is a blurred dismal memory. When she graduated her Mom convinced her to spend the summer in India. With her feet planted back on home soil she found enough grounding and regained strength to heal. Almost instantly she joined her grandmother in puja. Everyday she surrendered to the sun. And everyday the sun adorned her cheeks with warm kisses.


10 years passed. Ravi had her dreams of a job she loved, with an office overlooking the skyline and a big desk facing the sun. Thoughts of love and Jenna surfaced sometimes but didn't linger. She was healed and committed to living a full life.


Ravi added eucalyptus oil milk to her bath water and got in. The eve of her 30th birthday was filled with puja, reflection, and self care. Her favorite things. She was grateful. She finished her bath and sat on her bed in the fullness of her peace. She looked out her window and watched the sunset.  She grabbed her phone to take a picture and saw she had a Facebook messenger notification. 


She opened it. 


The message read:


My Ra-Ra,


Happy 30th Birthday to the most gorgeous woman I've ever known. 


Yours Always,

Jenna