Have you ever thanked GOD for not giving you what you wanted? Or at least what you thought you wanted?I am at an age where my friends are starting to get married and have kids...or just having kids. Now, its normal for young adult women to feel the pressure of wanting to be married to their soulmate and have a family of their own.
I was in that place of pressure one day after work when I stopped at the Shoppers to get me a single serving of Friday's Spinach dip, Tostitos, Lemonade and pack of Drumstick ice cream bars and ran into a girl I went to high school with. She was pushing a shopping cart with an infant snuggled in a carrier with one hand and holding the hand of a 3 year old with the other.
"Hey Girl!!!" she exclaimed.
I hate seeing some people from High School! They ask the same questions and they are extra hype for no reason. Especially when you ain't like my ass to begin with. But that's another post for another day.
"Heeeeey" I replied. You know like in a dry, oh no GOD why me, that's what I get for coming down the candy aisle kind of way?
She went on to introduce me to her two kids as "Auntie Cynthia"...*side eye* then grabbed my hand to touch her stomach to feel the new biscuit a baking in her womb. She went on to say she was engaged and marrying the love of her life. After several kaw kaw and key keys, yelling at her 3 year old for running up and down the aisles, and my restless leg syndrome flair up she ran down her list of questions for me:
"You married?"
"Engaged?"
"Got kids?"
"Talk to anybody from high school?"
After I answered "No" to all of the above. She replied "Oh". You know like in a dry, Oh GOD this bitch lame, that's what I get for coming down the candy aisle kind of way?
She then said "Well, it was nice seeing you boo, take care of yourself..." and dragged her cart and clan down the aisle. I can't stand when people say "take care of yourself", UH DUH, thats what I've been doing!!! The squeaky wheels from the cart provided the perfect Minuet to accompany that awkward moment in time.
After I got home. I started thinking am I behind in life? I'm not married, I have no kids...am I riding the short bus of life? Well, this contemplating gave me a gust of energy and I started to look up all my exes on Facebook and Instagram. I wanted to see what they were up to, some Inspector Gadget snooping...I mean "research".
Now, I won't call any of them out because at one point and time I really wanted to be with them. Snotted and cried when the relationship didn't work, and contemplated "what if" many times over. Today, they all are well, healthy, and vibrant based on their posts on social networks.
As I conducted my research I found:
Ex #1: Married, clearly cheating on his wife, who is clearly supporting him because he's unemployed. Ex #2: Seemingly straight to the world but likes every half naked and naked pic of men on Instagram he can find.
Ex #3: Good government job but is stuck on "Every girl in the World Wants Me" Land
Ex #4: Church goer, holy, hallowed be thy name, holy ghost filled, Bible toting, weed head.
After I was done I immediately dropped to my knees and said: "THANK YOU GOD FOR NOT GIVING ME WHAT I THOUGHT I WANTED!!!!!!!"
Just because I am not married or squatted out some babies yet doesn't mean I am not blessed. It's just not my time and I most definitely want GOD to only give it to me if it's time!
And to the high school classmates whose questionnaire is always so narrow, here is an update on me:
BA degree (CHECK)
MA degree (CHECK)
Worked for YOUR POTUS (CHECK)
Traveled the world (CHECK)
Established a non profit (CHECK)
Employed (CHECK)
Blessed (CHECK)
HIGHLY FAVORED (CHECK)
If you need more I will email you my resume.
